Gondor Calls For Aid - Day 75

Discussion in 'Ages 30-39' started by Kasper, May 11, 2023.

  1. 1MoreLookAway

    1MoreLookAway Member

    I totally agree with this! In retrospect the most common drugs are the most debilitating, porn; internet; tobacco; alcohol; video games; high-processed food.

    I'm curious to know , is this the first reboot where you have felt this way? I'd love to see how different generations have wrestled with this addiction.

    With regards to social anxiety I find just meeting with people helps. There was a website meetup.com where you can see a variety of groups to do with virtually every topic one can think, from cinema lovers to politics, you can choose a group that suits your interests and meet them in person. Depression I don't see as different from social anxiety, they have an almost symbiotic relationship. If you are socially anxious that's no problem, remember listening is just as social as talking, it's the aspect of communication that is too trivialised.

    You get better the more you do it, just like you did with IT, you gradually understood how computers communicate through frequent contact with them. I used to see my meetings as detective work. I feel this week I need to crack on with sorting my messy room out. How are your surroundings looking? It's understated but our environment usually is a reference to where we're at. Try as much as you can to look after that, I've noticed when I do that alone my mind declutters.

    I hope this reboot hasn't been unkind to your sleep cycle but I've seen people with depression, and I wish you a safe delivery from it.
  2. Kasper

    Kasper New Member

    This is the first reboot where there haven’t been other variables added in that could of been the cause of issues.

    Something I’ve failed to mentioned is when I first heard about this 10 years ago I went 90 days no pmo on the very first try. However, I was starting new medications or coming off ones and I didn’t know what was caused by what.

    I do remember very clearly that I had the worst insomnia ever then. I mean like sometimes it was 36 hours without sleep even with an ambien. It was insane. If that happened again right now I would fap in a heartbeat just to get rid of that.

    When I hit day 90 I was still dead and checked with porn and noticed a fuller erection but still wasn’t what I thought so I assumed it was bs.

    During that time I was surrounded by women at my job who were ready to go and I couldn’t. So the pressure from that and the unknown was very difficult.

    This time I really appreciate the no insomnia and pressure of not making excuses with women trying to kick the can down the road to day 90.

    Ideally I’m in a really good spot compared to most for this.
    Last edited: May 31, 2023
  3. 1MoreLookAway

    1MoreLookAway Member

    Insomnia is probably the worst side effect, thankfully it eases off. I hope you still have females in your vicinity, always remember whatever you do now will prepare you for when all systems are go! ;) Don't fear awkwardness, fear the status quo.

    I feel for you guys that have had ED, in my case I always get aroused in healthy ways like flirting, hugging, touching, mutual eye gazing, not like ogling in the street but with a lady you may know. If you've shut off porn, we can rewire in those mentioned subtle ways.

    Hitting 90 first try is otherworldly, I'd probably slipped a good 20 times before I got there. I like the pragmatism, how you're leveraging your experience. When I read your entries, it's very clear you have that screw p mentality, you've totally switched off the craving. I for one am excited for your future success story when it arrives. There's countless people you can inspire too and I know you being firm despite adversity, has helped motivate me to do the same.

    Keep on Kasper!
    Kasper likes this.
  4. BackOnTrack

    BackOnTrack Active Member

    I've never encountered insomnia due to no PMO, rather when I watch porn I find it hard to sleep, because of the rush.
  5. Kasper

    Kasper New Member

    I honestly never thought that the insomnia I was going through was from no pmo. Figured it was from the other variables at that time, which is most likely was.

    It wasn’t until I started this streak and joined the forums where I read others mentioning terrible insomnia so I guess no pmo has some effect on it for some folks.
  6. Kasper

    Kasper New Member

    In one of my previous posts I mentioned about being stubborn and forcing myself to listen to a full song even if I feel no excitement from it. Trying to re-train my brain.

    well I didn’t do that with music but I did with video games. Same game as always, when I sat down to play it I straight up got more depressed as usual. Like my brain knew logging into this was going to give no dopamine and tried its hardest to pull me away.

    I forced myself to stick with it through multiple days and now I can feel excitement from it. With that I feel as I have some dopamine floating around up there now so work has been going better as well.

    I still feel like I’m in a flatline as my penis is still shriveled and lifeless but it’s not as bad. Maybe I just need to do the same that I did with the video games with real women. Which is easier said than done.
  7. Kasper

    Kasper New Member

    Day 75

    Took a break for a few days from playing video games & hitting the gym bc busy days at work.

    I think the lack of dopamine from these has sent me into a rough depression.

    Sounds like this is similar to when users fap then go back into a bad flatline days after. Brain realizes it got a little hit of dopamine so its hitting the panic button bc it knows it might go back into dopamine starvation mode again.

    Erections are still around 30% hardness so no real change. 90 days is right around the corner which is cool but like i said at the start I knew there was no way of this being fixed in 3 months.
  8. 1MoreLookAway

    1MoreLookAway Member

    Great realisations, and very realistic goals
    Kasper likes this.
  9. Kasper

    Kasper New Member

    Had my first wet dream during this reboot on Saturday night. On Sunday I was so short tempered, craving food, no motivation.

    Still not as much drive as usual on Monday morning as I type this. Even though ive never left the flatline hopefully it hasnt sent me deeper into one.

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