Alright so back at this reboot thing. I won't start with a whole lot of backstory because I'm pretty much the typical story for young males of the high speed internet generation. I'm 22, started looking at lingerie mags around 12-13, then over 7 years, was looking at some pretty hardcore stuff. Stuff that when I really think about, is truly disgusting and I would never engage in. ED started becoming noticeable during the last two years of college when I would drunkenly hook up with chicks. I've only been in a couple "long" term relationships so the majority of my sexual experiences have been one-three night stands. I chalked it up mostly to being too drunk, too tired. But when it started to get REALLY noticeable, aka having to work so hard to stay hard for condom, thats when I knew something wasn't going right. I did the whole sh'bang. Went to see urologists, tried supplements, tried this or that exercise. Nothing worked. In the back of my mind I think I always knew the porn addiction was insane. I would pretty much watch porn every time I got in the shower. The iPhone really pushed that into the extreme levels. Anyway I finally came across YBOP and it all clicked. Once I read the reboot accounts that mirrored my situation identically, I vowed to never watch porn again. That was about 8 months ago. My first attempt at rebooting 8 months ago went pretty well. I got to about 60-75 days (was only keeping track in my head so I don't have an exact number) then I fucked up and relapsed hard. It quickly snowballed me back to the point where I was watching hardcore porn on my iPhone. I never really got back into porn like I used to but I was looking at it every 3-4 days. This went on with me attempting to reboot about 8 times and failing at about the 1 week mark. I don't know what was wrong with me. I just could not stop my urges. It felt like I became possessed by someone else every time I got the urge and my brain would just go "ah fuck it, why not?". I now know how truly insane that is. One part of my brain knowing I was messing myself up, the other part just saying ah fuck it who cares. Anyway I finally got myself off to a decent reboot again, albeit with a bit of a rocky start for the first 2 weeks. I'm currently on day 51 with only one relapse. I'm using every trick of the trade including k9 blocking. The thing that really has helped me get this far though is accountability software. My little brother is an amazing dude who is the only one I've been able to open up to about a lot of this stuff. Part of me opening up to him was me wanting to make sure he didn't get into porn at his age and save himself my current dilemma. He's my accountability software guy, both for my iPhone and my computer. Its so great. Instead of feeling restricted from my internet browsing, I actually feel incredibly liberated from my urges. I know he will see if I look at anything porn related and the shame I would get from letting him down prevents me from edging even a little bit. Awesome. So now I'm on day 51. 2 days ago I had a wet dream that i vividly remember being just like watching a porn video. It felt like I was just watching porn again. I woke up with the orgasm and everything. The next day I had the worst depression I've ever had in my life. Stress with school issues, moving to a new city, and a weekend of binge drinking a few days before, all combined with the "porn" wet dream to make me feel like the biggest piece of shit. Its been two days since then and I'm still not back to the happy, motivated dude I was on day 45-47. I decided to start journaling on here as a means of getting in touch with how I really feel and keep track of my reboot progress. Having some accountability to the community on here is also just some great extra motivation to keep on track. It's kind of hard for me to judge where I'm at with this whole thing because I had a great start, months of relapsing, and now I'm on a decent attempt at it again. I know I'm technically not on day 51 because of my rocky start and 1 relapse, but I'm happy with my progress so I'm just going to keep counting up from here as a means of feelin good. Maybe you dudes can help me figure out how recovered I am. Or how unrecovered...Here's some of changes I've noticed... - Other than the last few days of stress and shiftiness after the wet dream, I do generally feel more motivated and happy to get out of the house. The fact that the weather is getting so nice helps that a lot too. I feel like working out, doing p90x as much on schedule as I can. - The days leading up to the wet dream and even during the shitty days following, I've definitely had morning wood at about 70-80%. Sometimes it'll be morning wood that wakes me up, only to have me fall back asleep and wake up flaccid. Other times I'll wake up with a decent stuffy that sticks around for a couple minutes then dies off. Especially if I get up to walk around. I'm not getting discouraged though. On my first reboot attempt I remember getting to a point at about 60-70 days where I would wake up, go to the bathroom, and have to lean WAY back because I was still so hard. - I do feel more in touch with myself. I find it much easier to look ahead in life and even though thats kind of scary sometimes, I think it's a good thing. I've come to recognize a number of insecurities I have, which I hope getting through this reboot will help. - Right up to the "porn" wet dream, I found it easier to make eye contact with people. Especially on the street, or meeting someone new. Looking people in the eye really does show someone a lot of confidence. I highly recommend everyone try their best to look people in the eye when you speak to them, even if you find it difficult at first. It gets easier. I will say however that after my wet dream, I feel way more anxious in social situations. Hopefully I haven't been set back too much by this unconscious relapse - You definitely do start getting more attention from girls but when you look at the gain in confidence, it really isn't that much of a mystery. Women are attracted to confidence in all its forms. If you're a confident dude who talks a whole bunch, women will be interested in what you have to say. If you're a confident dude who doesn't say too much, women will be interested in what makes you tick. I still have yet to try out the hardware with any of them but I'm sure I'll be finding myself in more potential sexy times the more confidence I gain in myself and mr johnson. It's weird. Some days with this I feel great and I'm convinced I could have successful sex with little to no ED. Other days I feel like there's no way I could get hard and I don't have any libido. Unfortunately Im supposed to go over and watch a movie with a girl tonight and I'm still feelin shitty from the "porn" wet dream. If I do get intimate with her, I'll do my best to enjoy and see what happens. If anything it'll be an indication of if I've made enough progress or not. Anyway dudes, I'm gonna try to update this thing every couple days. If you have any questions please post em. I've been there for pretty much the highest highs and lowest lows of this process over the past 8 months. I've relapsed. I've started up again. I've used pretty much every technique and software available. So I'm more than willing to help. Good luck to everyone and stay strong. This process works. Even though I've yet to fully recover, the benefits I have seen and the accounts I've read show me its possible for anyone. What's an hour of unfulfilling pleasure compared to a lifetime of happiness?