The beginning of my story does not have much of a twist to it; basically like a lot of people here (good kid turned retard that kind of shit xD). The only difference is that I had some anxiety issues even when I was a kid. It has been more than a year and half since I actually got addicted to porn and gradually esclated to extreme forms of porn. It is funny now that I think about it! Why? because I quit my video game addiction and really fast developed PORN addiction since I had a lot of free time. Before that I rarely would watch porn. It was mostly only masturbation without porn. But, this doesn't mean Porn has not brake me, actually I am pretty much fucked up! I guess because of my really fast esclation to extreme forms of porn and pushing myself to my limits a lot by edging and preventing ejaculation for more than my body and nervous system could handle I got fucked up much faster that I should have. I came across YBOP 6 month ago after a year of Porn addiction. I discovered why I was so fucked up in general. I mean If I was to give grade to my health, I would give it 3 out of ten. Yes! that much fucked up... So my Initial problem was not ED. I was urinating excessively to the point of constant dehydration and doctors couldn't really figure anything out (I have alot of different symptoms which somehow makes me think that I have something called dysautonomia and it actually makes sense since I was fucking my nervous system up). That's why I started looking for an answer and found YBOP and started no fap. But, my goals got bigger. I continued no fap because I was sick of this unproductive life, I was not meeting my own standards and expectations. I just wanted to be a better person, work harder, have motivation, be more disciplined and be able to do what I always wanted to. So I did it and went 94 days PMO free... but I relapsed! I lost hope! Because nothing got better or I thought that way...... It was so stupid..... I was mad about a girl, had some things going on in life that made me feel depressed so I said screw it lets just have fun.... I started playing video games again excessively and started watching porn again for almost 20-25 days till I pulled myself together and started again. But, After about 45 days of abstein I relapsed again. For the same fucking reasons I suppose. I was pissing more than usual and was fucked up heavily in the head. fortunately this time I just PMOed twice then got my shit together and started thinking logically. I am starting the process again with some adjustments! I'm starting a journal obviously; something that I didn't have. Also, this time I'm gonna be more patient and take it a little bit easier on myself since I expect a lot from myself and I usually fail to meet those expectations. In addition, I'm gonna accept failiure as part of the life in general and I'm not gonna be pissed at myself just because I'm urinating like an alcoholic everyday. I'll be posting stuff here from now on. Any support is appreciated.