Free from Suffering

Discussion in 'Ages 30-39' started by Professor Chaos, Nov 11, 2012.

  1. Professor Chaos

    Professor Chaos Active Member

    Day 41.

    Not much to report. Up in the mountains with family for the weekend. Having been feeling some real surges in energy and productivity recently. Feel excited about life in a way that feels really good.

    No real urges, although I caught myself on Instagram straying towards so less than family friendly posts. Nothing extreme, but I need to be mindful. Will uninstall the app if it happens again. Good to come on here and confess as it keeps me accountable and stops me minimizing any potential slip ups.

    Thanks guys.

    PC
     
    Merton, TheScriabin and Gilgamesh like this.
  2. -Luke-

    -Luke- Active Member

    Sounds really good PC. Have a nice weekend with your family!

    Instagram was always danger zone for me, too. Good to see that it didn't escalate for you.
     
    Professor Chaos likes this.
  3. TheScriabin

    TheScriabin Well-Known Member

    Ooh mountains, good for the soul :) Enjoy
     
  4. Merton

    Merton Well-Known Member

    Congrats on 41! I pretty much never go on Instagram exactly for the reason you mentioned. I am too trained to use social media as pmo material.
     
  5. Professor Chaos

    Professor Chaos Active Member

    That sounds very wise Merton. I think Instagram is particularly triggering as you a sifting through images. Mentally sorting and cataloging what you are looking at. It’s ok if you are just looking at holiday snaps of friends, but if you are in a vulnerable place like most of us are, it will guide you towards more extreme material. It also knows what you ‘like’ so it will feed you a very specific diet.

    It’s a bit like the saying ‘don’t go shopping when your hungry’. Don’t use social media if your horny.

    Hope everyone else made it through the weekend ok.

    PC
     
    SeekingWisdom, Mekkeren and Merton like this.
  6. Professor Chaos

    Professor Chaos Active Member

    Day 49

    Been a mixed bag this weekend. Couple of real mood swings and a dark patch on Sat morning. Could feel myself wanting to act out.

    Instagram continues to be a risk. Was browsing and a female friend posted a link parallel to a fetish I have. Stopped following her as a result. I think I said i’d Delete the app if that happened again.

    I’ve been hitting the iron again at the gym. Also lost a ton of body weight since beginning of the year. I’m not a big guy, but lost about 9kgs and around 10cm off my waste. Gym is good, plus vegan diet. Lots more energy than i’ve Had before.

    Waiting for floors to dry after mopping. Next up groceries, then potter away on art projects in my shed.

    Hope you guys are all doing ok.

    PC
     
  7. Thelongwayhome27

    Thelongwayhome27 Active Member

    Nice man. Well done !
     
  8. Professor Chaos

    Professor Chaos Active Member

    Day 52

    Got lots done over the weekend. Met up with an old friend from my sharking/single days back in LA on Monday. She’s a rather stunning tall red-head and just got out of a divorce.

    We have always been candid with each other and never quite dated, but there was a spark. She talked about married life and I ended telling her about my current struggle with P and she told me about her exes battle with ED. The bit that I wanted to come clean her about was she told me that SHE had resorted to looking at P because she was so frustrated in the bedroom for over a year.

    I could feel myself getting WAY too interested in the details. Managed to steer the conversation back towards safer waters, but my curiosity was definitely peaked. I have a few female friends I know that use P and I have no judgement against anyone who does. What was triggering was being too interested in the details. Fuel for fantasies.

    Anyway we parted ways, her off to go find her path and wander around and me to head back to the office.

    Listening to her talking about dating in LA made me glad to be a happily married man.

    My wife made an awesome cheesecake I shared around the office today. I feel very blessed.

    Peace to you all.
    PC
     

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