Edit: Decided to add more about me I have never written a journal before, and I hope that it will prove to be helpful to myself and others. I have tried a reboot prior to joining this site or even finding YBOP. I had no idea it was a reboot but I wanted to quit watching porn, I knew it was unhealthy and addicting. But, when I discovered YBOP I truly learned why I had gone through some seemingly unexplained changes since I was 13. The first time I ever viewed porn was when my friend showed it to me, and if I could take it back I would have. I used to have a life before porn use escalated. I was engaged to a beautiful artist, yes we were young (18) but we were very much in love and were ready. Well I used porn every once in a while but slowly over the time we were together it escalated to the point one day that I simply could not get it up. She asked over and over what was wrong. I had no idea, no answer. She simply didn't arouse me. I felt empty, felt nothing She soon after tried again (few days). Same problem occurred and it did not occur to me it was porn, I was oblivious. I did not realize up until about a month ago what happened to me. And her sudden conclusion I was not attracted to her anymore and that she had no idea how to get over that came to me quickly. We did try for months to fix it but dumbass me kept the use going the whole time. Eventually she gave up. I was distraught, but I thank her in a way, that experience combined with Gary's talk changed my life, worked as a double-helix to show me that I had to change. I wish I could undo all of this But that can't be done, so focusing on the here and now is necessary in order to beat this. My last reboot lasted about 2 weeks and after having a falling out with a girl I like I became depressed and relapsed. Now I didn't binge, but even one PMO is most definitely a mistake. A week later I relapsed again. Since the 24th I haven't PMO'd and I discovered the PMO counter this site has. It has been motivating to say the least, I like being able to visibly see progress, and the counter being off by a day isn't a bother, what's 1 more day? But I digress. I found that today and yesterday have been difficult, many urges and mental compromises presented themselves, and I took comfort in knowing I have no way to access porn at all. I installed K9, made a new email for it, made random generated passwords for both and put random keyboard spam as the answers to my questions on the email. I also provided no back up email. Damn it feels good to know I can't see it on my laptop. Only problem is I have a smartphone and I try my best to keep it out of sight and out of mind. I heard though that the first two weeks are the worst, and I think I can manage. I really want that blue star Well, I guess that's it for now. I will write in here if I ever get bored or my hands become astray, keeping occupied is the most important thing and this journal will likely be the outlet I need for my boredom.