Hi, I'm new to the forum and would hereby like to introduce myself properly before jumpin into my journal. I'm a 21 year old guy from Belgium (I'm dislexic and English isn't my native language so forgive any typo's), still live at my parent's house allong with my sister. i've nearly finished a course in electricity and i'm close to starting to work in this profession aswell. Not feeling verry elaborate at the moment I'm just going to jump into my journal here. I started M when i was as young as 7-8 years old i believe and i still remember doing it a lot back then (especially from 10-12 yrs). We didn't have internet or anything like that and i wasn't looking for porn at all. That changed when we got internet when i was about 13. i had been over at a friends place a few times and we looked up some pictures of naked women etc. so i knew where to look and the first chance i had when I had the place to myself i was looking up pictures. As I grew older and became more skilled at using the computer I started downloading some porn clips and even short movies. my parents and sister used to go to bed early and I've always been a bad sleeper so i stayed up and no one bothered me at all. I think i skipped over the softcore porn and went straight to the hardcore stuff (naturally the pictures didn't do it for me anymore after that). This carried on till i got my first laptop at about age 16. i now had a laptop in my room which ment i could do my thing all day every day. the porn escalated to more extreme porn etc we all know how it goes. At age 18 i got a girlfriend (my first). we had a sexual relation which lasted for about a year. and this is where my first ED problems showed up. i remember that i had a hard time getting it up at times (failing at times). and condoms were (still are) a big problem, they made me lose my wood instantly and made it verry hard to O. i still remember that if i had watched P up to 5 days prior to having sex with het i would have problems (so even back then i knew porn was messing with me, even tho i never gave it any concious thought). I was 19 when we broke up and haven't had sex ever since. on one occasion i had an offer for a trio and i just couldn't perform cause of anxiety and on another occasion i was realy drunk and tried to have sex with a girl i just met but i never got hard. which brings us to the present. i was sick of all the failure and ED (a guy my age shouldn't have ED). and i found that it's time for me to get a girlfriend. searching the web in hopes of finding an answer to my question: what's wrong with my sex drive, i found YBOP. reading the accounts on the site was like reading a description of my life so far . It was a tremendous releaf to find that i'm not the only one suffering of this problem. so i had one last jack off that night and started my revolution (A revolution (from the Latin revolutio, "a turn around") is a fundamental change in power or organizational structures that takes place in a relatively short period of time) on 11 february 2012 so i'm 16 days into my PMO abstinance and i'll walk you through the last few days. the first days were weird, i didn't feel a lot of urges and the thought of changing was kind of exciting. after day 5 it became harder tho, more cravings etc but my mood had changed for the better. in the second week i felt tired all the time with some sudden bursts of energy every now and then (i wonder if this happened to anyone else). but i felt on top of the world even now i still do, my confidence is at an all time high, i'm motivated to work, diet, work out and my personal hygene has inproved aswell. for a few days i thought i was in the flatline but yesterday i had morning wood so i don't think i'm not quiet there yet. another big difference i noticed is that instaid of having to use porn to get turned on, i started to use my fantasy again (something i haven't done in over 8 years i think. i hope to get some feedback from you guys out here cause god knows i can use some extra motivation. i question i'd like to ask to finish up this post is how counterproductive for the reboot it would be to MO (without P or fanthasy). i feel like i have to rub one out all the time even tho i don't seem to crave porn a lot atm.