Considering an escort? Don't, here is why.

Discussion in 'Pornography Addiction' started by hope2overcome, May 21, 2015.

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  1. hope2overcome

    hope2overcome No Love, No Sex

    I visited one last month but not for sex just to see if my junk still works. To my surprise, it does but also, i left feeling worse than I got there.

    An escort isn't helpful at all for the most part. Most get addicted to escort sites and/or escorts themselves.

    This is a short article explaining the damage a man causes himself by doing this. This is why dignity is very important.

    http://elitedaily.com/dating/sex/why-real-men-dont-have-to-pay-for-it/
     
  2. Panonymos

    Panonymos Humility is a virtue

    Damn right.
     
  3. SmallStroke

    SmallStroke Member

    Terrible article.

    I don't have any experience with escorts but the only reason I can see why you shouldn't use one is because it could make you complacent.
    Unless paying for sex is against your morals, then you obviously shouldn't do it.
     
  4. fathomer

    fathomer New Member

    I love articles/saying that use the term,"real man"
    can I still hire a cleaning lady once a week? or do "real men" clean their own homes"
    can I be ok if I drink water or do "real men" drink only beer"
    can I not smoke? or do "real men" smoke?
    yeah, chasing after someone elses thoughts about a "real man" is absurd. do what makes you happy, in the short and long term.
    [​IMG]
     
  5. ls558

    ls558 Member

    I agree with the idea that real men don't pay for sex. The article was terribly written though, and at the end she just completely murdered her own argument by mentioning that real men have one night stands. I have to disagree with that. One night stands are irresponsible and reckless.
     
  6. Newnes

    Newnes Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I follow you here.

    I also agree with fathomer that "real men" is absurd. What are real men? Does that mean other males aren't real men? Are they kids, do they become women because they don't do what Bruce Willis and other "real men" do? Do they become animals? Nah. They are men who didn't find themselves, who aren't in touch with their deep selves, that's all. And if a woman does what real men do, does she become a man? Does she grow balls and hairs and a deeper voice? :p

    Responsible people, aka "real men and women", do what's in their short and long-term interest, and when there is conflict, long-term interest should prevail (and who understand that hurting others isn't in their interests, either).
     
  7. hope2overcome

    hope2overcome No Love, No Sex

    @IS588, go out tonight and see how difficult it is to get a one night stand. Try doing it sober. It requires men to approach a woman channel her attraction and make her compliant. So, a one night stand takes more skill than hiring an escort, lol.


    @Newnes, we as men have to get in touch with our deeper selves, you are right about that. Forget the past, lets move forward in being the men that far exceeds that of women.
     
  8. Newnes

    Newnes Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I don't understand the "being the men that far exceeds that of women" ?
     
  9. fathomer

    fathomer New Member

    he seems to be saying there is more to being a man than dealing with females.
    if a man got all the woman chasing after him, yet he was poor, unaccomplished, weak/out of shape 400lbs guy, would you really want to be him?
     
  10. fathomer

    fathomer New Member

    LOL
    real men are constantly paying for sex
    I give blood and Im always asked, "did you pay for sex in hte last year?"
    well, yeah, of course I did
    I paid to join a dating site
    paid for dinner to take a girl out
    paid for popcorn
    paid for desserts

    would I have done any of that without sex as a goal?
    no
    so did I pay for sex?
    yes, look at what I did in terms of math
    would a girl have given me sex if she had paid?
    no, that's not how society works.so is paying for sex directly "bad"?
    No, that's illogical, don't get brainwashed by the "real man" sTUFF
    dont think paying for sex is at all like dating. you are having fun and getting your rocks off NOT making friends
    then again, how many of your friends are girls you've dateD?

    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]
     
  11. hope2overcome

    hope2overcome No Love, No Sex

    You guys missed the point. The article is not about "real men", it's more about a women isn't someone you should just buy. Even escorts feel bad when they are treated as much, that is why they like to establish rules as to how things will go down.

    I think a large symptom of constant PMO'ing is that we unconsciously think of women as sex objects. The idea that a women's body shouldn't be for sale is foreign to us because of this sex crazed objectification of women society we live in. Just like how we thought it was okay to watch porn. I have started to disassociate fantasies of sex when I look at women and I am beginning to see things more clearly now.
     
  12. Newnes

    Newnes Well-Known Member Staff Member

    @fathomer: Just because the man/woman relations include that the man pays for lunch/cinema/whatever doesn't mean he "pays for sex". You can't see things from this pure mathematical standpoint. Even if you pay, she can say yes or no to having sex. So you don't really pay for sex. You pay to appear as a provider, to show that you abide by the social rules, and hence you pay to prove you're not a creepy weirdo. Incidentally, yes, you do increase your chances of getting laid (because she will more likely have sex with a normal guy than a psychopath).

    When we think that paying the bill at a date is paying for a date, it shows just what hope2overcome wanted to make as a point when he says "I think a large symptom of constant PMO'ing is that we unconsciously think of women as sex objects" - I think it's due to our society, and PMO (especially the porn component) only makes things worse.

    We didn't miss the point. There's a big (EDIT: I initially wrote "no" instead of "a big" here, I don't know why, but now it's rectified) difference between "real men" (if like me, you requalify real men as responsible people, in touch with their deep selves) and people who think we can buy women/objectify women that much. Porn, among other things and factors, prevents/hinders us from being "real men" because of that.
     
  13. rebooting

    rebooting Member

    Contrary to popular belief, most men don't go to a prostitute for sexual gratification. They often go because of a lack of intimacy in their lives. They crave for female companionship, which is exactly the opposite of objectification. Of course, there are sex addicts who go for a quicky, but most men go for an emotional need that they seek. That's why men usually become very disappointed with most prostitutes, because they provide cold, careless, mechanical sex. Men want a girlfriend experience. It explains why high class escorts are so expensive.
     
  14. hope2overcome

    hope2overcome No Love, No Sex

    @Newnes, yes you did miss the point by a mile.

    Of course there is a difference between a real man and someone who visits prostitutes. Real men are satisfied by the effort required to get the prize the latter group is looking for a fast fix. Real men work hard to get to where they wanna be or who they wanna be with, the latter group just pays for it. Clearly there is a difference and it does you no goooood at all by claiming there is no difference between the two groups. Porn has made you lose touch of simple matters like this. It was only last week I discovered this myself, so I uncovered the whool from underneath my eyes and sharing this with you so you can do the same.

    @rebooting, you are right on the money for sure. The type of intimacy they want is not gonna do the job in an hour. Intimacy feels a lot better when you worked for it than payed for it.
     
  15. fathomer

    fathomer New Member

    in most cases, yes you can
    have a guy not pay, is he going to get sex?

    doubtful

    but I am not saying you can buy a relationship, commitment, friends,, just sex
    if you want sex, go buy sex
    if you want everything else, then you have to date

    buying a hooker will get you sex, maybe stds, beaten up, robbed, killed(depending how you do it) but it is very unlikely to get you something you'd want, other than sex
     
  16. fathomer

    fathomer New Member

    get off the "real men" ride.
    hookers(paying for sex) have been around in our culture, other cultures and even animal cultures

    People do different things for different reasons, there is nothing wrong with paying for sex, just make sure it won't hinder you to reaching your final goal.
    [​IMG]
     
  17. Newnes

    Newnes Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Lol it took me a few minutes to figure out why I didn't understand how I missed the point. You're absolutely right. I said "There's no difference between "real men" (if like me, you requalify real men as responsible people, in touch with their deep selves) and people who think we can buy women/objectify women that much." and I actually meant the exact opposite. So:

    We totally agree, I just said the opposite of what I meant. Sorry about that. I just edited my post above to make it clearer.

    @fathomer: I didn't say there isn't math involved in the process... I said we can't see the picture from a mathematical standpoint, because this is something minor. It neglects more important factors, and the context.
     
  18. ls558

    ls558 Member

    This isn't about skill, it's about goals. If your goal is a one night stand, then what are you really aiming for in life? Temporary satisfaction, just like jacking off to pixels. Maybe I'm naive, but I think a person who has healed from a porn habit would have a different goal in mind... for instance, having sex regularly with the same partner(s).
     
  19. Osa

    Osa New Member

    I don't see the difference between paying for sex and sleeping with strangers for free. It causes pretty much the same damage in the end.
     
  20. hope2overcome

    hope2overcome No Love, No Sex


    @fathomer, I cant believe you stooped so low as to intentionally display trigger images. Everything you say from this point on is ignorance and proof against you. Your arguments aren't even being considered by me anymore. Go to another thread.
     
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