Breaking free - a 120 days hard mode journal

Discussion in 'Ages 30-39' started by BoughtWithBlood, May 5, 2020.

  1. BoughtWithBlood

    BoughtWithBlood Well-Known Member

    Was really doing well these last couple of days. Super focused and motivated, working out, praying, working, practicing discipline, hard mode.. but last night I thought it was a good idea to bring the laptop to bed.. stupid in hindsight, cause I relapsed.

    Not giving up though, I want to succeed!
    Professor Chaos likes this.
  2. Professor Chaos

    Professor Chaos Well-Known Member

    Hello my friend,

    Sorry to hear you have been struggling. I must admit I’m not a fan of terms like ‘Hard Mode’. I guess getting over this stuff for me is more like ‘Relax Mode’. Given your relationship break up and other struggles you’ve been going through it’s no wonder you are finding it hard to stay on the path. Instead of putting so much pressure on yourself, try relaxing a little more. Try being a little more gentle with yourself.

    I know that for myself P use was intrinsically linked to stress. The more stress, the more P use. Learning other tools for relaxing and being a bit kinder to myself made a huge difference.

    I look back on old physical journals I used to write and they have a similar tone to yours. I was never good enough, I always needed to try harder and I was a burden to those around me.

    It’s taken me years to shift my thinking, but it’s been a huge part of my journey. Start with being kind. Start with compassion. It’s what all the great teachers point to.

    Good luck. You got this. Don’t be afraid to ask for help.


    BoughtWithBlood likes this.

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