Tuesday 1st May 2018 Hi everyone, I was always anxious about sharing my experience but ive been stuck in the cycle for too long. I started first at age 11, looking at models but not masturbating. At around 13 i started watching videos of naked women and masturbating, progressing to high speed internet porn. Due to a lot of social anxiety starting at around 10 ot 11, coincidence or porn related i dont know yet, i didnt really form strong relationships, especially with girls, for much of my secondary school years. As a horny teenager, all my sexual satisfaction and honestly the only contact i had with women was with porn. Some days it would be the only thing i could think about. I was first introduced to porn being problematic at 16, finding a nofap video on youtube. Ever since i have been battling on and off with very limited success. The last couple of years ive started 6th form and had more contact with women, some showing very blatant interest in me. Due to my anxiety and porn use, i didnt have the confidence or desire to get to know them and pushed them all away, something i deeply regret now. At this point now i have been battling with anxiety at school and generally feel like a walking zombie. I have no energy and despite significant improvement in social anxiety, i still struggle to connect with anyone. I feel like i have no personality and have a blank and foggy mind when i try and talk to anyone. Luckily i havent developed any violent or disgusting porn tastes and still can masturbate to vanilla porn and bikini pictures. For this reason i hope i havent developed pied, although i havent had the chance to test. Despite this the negative impacts porn is having on my life is so obvious to me now that i need to change something. I can finally admit that i am addicted and put steps in place to recover. Im going to make a habit of posting something here everyday, hoping that by documenting my journey it can help others who are also struggling. See you tomorrow.