@Mozenjo - As always - thanks for your support and encouragement! As I think you have used as an analogy - we have to do whatever we can to stop creating the pattern of circling the drain! And it starts with building muscle memory to cut off the different temptations at their roots each time! @ruggerdoug - Good to get better acquainted! I know you and Moz are longer term brothers on this forum - and I truly respect your staying power and continued fight to conquer this beast of an addiction. I knew I had an addiction many years ago - but I never had the will power to start trying until my PIED was very clearly ruining my love life and marriage. I wish I had the fortitude to start earlier at this like you and Moz. Even small steps would have improved my life a lot. I now have a lot of motivation - as its very clear - my wife and I have a much more loving and overall satisfying relationship, when our sex life is a vibrant part of our dynamics together. As you may have read - my wife is away for business for weeks at a time (something I knew and accepted well before we got married). But now the periods away definitely add a more difficult level to abstaining from P and M. Ironically - in the past - it gave me much added alone time to feed my addiction. But I went 100 days - so I know I can do it. I just have to put my two relapses from Sept in the rear view mirror and stay the course. Thanks to all the brothers who "like" and/or respond to my posts. None of us will will reach our goals with out the support of each other. And I know frequent journaling is a key to success! Let's all stay strong and focused.