A serious attempt

Discussion in 'Erectile Dysfunction / Delayed Ejaculation' started by shattered, Feb 12, 2017.

  1. shattered

    shattered Member

    All,
    I've been around for a very long time. I have a bad MO addiction, and I'm convinced that many problems in my life (heavy drinking, anxiety, depression, lack of confidence with women, and of course ED and low libido) can be traced back to the MO habit. I used to blame Accutane, but after thinking about this deeply for literally decades, I am now pretty convinced that it's my solo habits. LION and Troychambers44 posts in particular helped me come to this conclusion. There are many others on here that have helped me as well.

    One thing I've learned is that when you begin rebooting, something very stressful is bound to occur in your life. Prepare for that.

    So here goes: I'm almost 40, and I intend to never MO again. I will abstain from alcohol for a month, and then limit myself after that.

    I will check back in periodically for accountability.
     
  2. shattered

    shattered Member

    I was off to a bad start. I relapsed to MO the day after the day I intended to stop it once in for all. The good news is I have not MO'ed since Feb 16th, and I feel resolved enough to continue that trend. As far as alcohol, I have made a little progress reducing it. Fortunately, my cravings for it have decreased. I will have to go for abstinence a month or so now. Too many social events make it hard to quit completely.
     
  3. shattered

    shattered Member

    Masturbated last night. I was basically tired and a little hung over. MOing to cure a hangover is a problem that comes up periodically.

    Resolved once more. New alcohol rule: 2 drinks maximum, and do not drink alone.
     
  4. Ocguy

    Ocguy Member

    It's easy to abstain or resolve to when you're in a flatline. The real reboot begins when you can masterbate with ease but somehow choose not to
     
  5. shattered

    shattered Member

    Well, I was told by a woman I liked that she wasn't entering new relationships right now. So what did I do in response? Went home and whacked. The logic problem is obvious enough.
     
  6. shattered

    shattered Member

    Reset: drinking too much and masturbating.
     
  7. shattered

    shattered Member

    Geez, I can just copy and paste my last comment. My typical pattern is I might get some sort of outing with a beautiful girl, but then I'm with her realizing that I'm not going to get sex or even a kiss, and I start drinking more. Then I get home half wasted, and my guard is down because of the alcohol, and then I masturbate.

    Really need to break this cycle.
     
  8. shattered

    shattered Member

    Update, sex is happening
     
  9. shattered

    shattered Member

    I'm starting to get more sexual opportunities. Someone really sort of fell in love with me which is a great feeling. I MOed on April 9th. I went 10 days without drinking but got back into it.
     
  10. shattered

    shattered Member

    I am drinking still, but I had sex with 2 different women. I used Levitra both times. One was with a condom which didn't work out all that great, and the other was without a condom which worked great. My goal is to be able to have sex with a condom without Levitra.

    I think I can stay away from MO which is a 20+ year addition for me. Alcohol is a struggle but it's related to these ED issues. I'm sometimes wonder if I had no ED problems could I give up alcohol. The answer is probably no because every time I have a successful sexual encounter, I want to celebrate with a drink.

    The dates for my sexual encounters for my own records:
    Sex with condom April 6th 1x
    Sex without condom April 18th 3x
    Last MO was April 9th.
     
  11. shattered

    shattered Member

    Last MO was May 13th. It was nice to have sexual encounters, but it's questionable whether or not I could have performed without Levitra. There was someone moderately attractive that wanted me all the time, but I kind of pushed her away. I guess what I'm after is the same thing I've been after for 20 years, I just want to regain a strong libido. I'm drinking the equivalent of 4 drinks every night. I'm focusing on reducing that and improving my life intellectually and physically. My hope is libido is a by-product of this.
     
    Last edited: May 18, 2017
  12. shattered

    shattered Member

    Last PMO was yesterday 5/29/2017
     
  13. shattered

    shattered Member

    Last PMO was 06/09/2017. I haven't had a drink of alcohol since 05/31/2017. I'm consistently exercising. I'm finding new hobbies.

    Basically, I'm trying to just chill out about sexual issues, and still intend to avoid MO for an extended period of time. I let my self slip this time because I was doing so well avoiding alcohol.
     
  14. shattered

    shattered Member

    MO'ed on 6/15/2017
     
  15. shattered

    shattered Member

    MO'ed 6/30/2017

    I did it for the stupidest reason. Wanted to make a start date so I could say I didn't MO for 6 months at the start of the New Year...

    Anyways, resolved again.
     
  16. shattered

    shattered Member

    Again, I MO'ed for a stupid reason. I drank too much last night and was on the verge of being hung over, so I thought a little MO would cure the hang over.
     
  17. shattered

    shattered Member

    alcohol and PO, exact copy of the post on Jul 4. I did this on the night of 7/14 and 7/15 morning. On the bright side, I went out drinking and got some hot girls contact info. That was a boost to the ego.
     
  18. shattered

    shattered Member

    I've got some positive results to report. I abstained from MO from 7/15 to 8/10, so roughly 25 days. I abstained from alcohol from 7/15 to 8/12.

    Predictably, eventually enough stress will build up and my usual way to runaway from the real world is MO. I think I also used it to go to sleep that night.

    The time without alcohol was very useful for me to think hard about the role of alcohol in my life.

    Next step - total eradication of MO from my life, and a game plan to manage alcohol.
     
  19. shattered

    shattered Member

    MO just now.
    Alcohol habit under control so far.
     
  20. shattered

    shattered Member

    So I had 5 drinks last night and MO'ed. Never underestimate the power of habit.
     

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