Day 2. I had a huge hangover during Sunday and it make me relapse. It was the typical slippery slope thinking that caused it. First I felt urges, then thought, that why not take a look, I do not even need to touch myself.. you all knew this story. It ended not just one, but even two PMO. Because theres always an argument to do the further damage, when you have taken the first wrong step. I should have known better but whats done is done. I must begin to build my life energy from the scraps again. Now its second day, I was clean yesterday. Felt all too familiar melancholy upon me. All I could think yesterday, was how this all is so big waste for my life, devastation of my potential. How the drug have really robbed me so much good that I could have felt and obtained during my life, but what has never happened because giving in to artificial temptations.. Its no use to beat myself up, I know that also. I had quite good day despite the relapse. But it could have been even more awesome day without it. I will try to learn this lesson at last. Thanks for cheering me up, guys! I will try again, hoping to be wiser and hold the awareness with me all the time.