7 years of hell

Discussion in 'Ages 30-39' started by sveltest, Jan 15, 2019.

  1. sveltest

    sveltest Member

    Bro...you get laid. By the hottest girls your subconscious can create. No set back.

    ...by all the gods...she was perfect
     
    Last edited: Jan 21, 2019
    Thelongwayhome27 likes this.
  2. sveltest

    sveltest Member

    Day 7.

    I woke up early cleaned my place. Went out around 6:00 am to look for a place to shovel snow. Made the money i needed to make.

    Makes you feel like a man when you can get things done
     
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  3. sveltest

    sveltest Member

    Day 8

    Bad dreams and night sweats and chills last night. DOAMT. Dreams of absentminded transgression. I was doing ALLLL the bad shit. Totally cracked out at this party. Seemed like all these skinny fucking crackheads wanted to kill me. So im trying to defend this girl in a dream from these fuckwits breaking arms and necks and smashing them. Then about 10 more show up with box cutters...fffffffuuuuu /the end

    I dont think it has much to do with my reboot persay.

    Class today. Then gym for the first time in months. Gonna take it slow still sore from those pushups and curls i did at home
     
    Intothewild89 likes this.
  4. Intothewild89

    Intothewild89 Active Member

    I gotta get back into cardio and squat routine. Its does wonders for my PE and mental state. We want to perform like the guys we see in porn. We tend to forget those same guys hit the gym whenever they can and take care of business. Are they able to last for so long because they sit around and watch porn all day with anxiety disorders? Shit no, they get shit done. They take care of their bodies. They do whats nessicary. Good luck on the journey man. I should start some strength training myself.
     
  5. sveltest

    sveltest Member

    ya i guess we want to perform like them...thats not why i train tho lol...

    Well i musta been there at least 90 minutes full body plus striking the heavy bag...theres always girls in the boxing room stretching and stuff and i get a bit self conscious because i feel like im over intense and kinda scary but maybe they like it.

    Squat and Deadlift way down but thats to be expected...i gotta eat more and get ahold of some creatine...

    You really should start...even if its just at home or whatever...youd be surprised how fast your body changes
     
  6. Caoimhín

    Caoimhín Winter's coming...

    Totally have been there. One of the things that gets me down is when I am surrounded by things that need to get done. Just overwhelms me so I do nothing. But, from past experience I know, if I do even one of the jobs, suddenly I go from the worst loser in the world to feeling like an actual adult man.
     
  7. sveltest

    sveltest Member

    thats why i try to get up and make my bed every day...first thing. Its a small thing but it gives you momentum. Anything big you want to accomplish starts small. A smile can turn into a hello into a 2 minute convo into a date into...you get the idea.

    So many people dont know where to start.

    Just start anywhere.
     
  8. Caoimhín

    Caoimhín Winter's coming...

    This is actually my new motto for the year "JUST DO IT!"

    I overthink everything and am becoming more and more aware of the weight of carrying unmade decisions around in my head.
     
    Intothewild89 likes this.
  9. sveltest

    sveltest Member

    nike wasnt wrong

    Day 9.

    Sore. Weary.

    I keep having dreams were im ABOUT to fuck these super hot girls but i wake up before

    Headed to the gym as soon as it opens then class.

    Dont be paralyzed by indecision. Im far from perfect lord knows...just do it.
     
  10. sveltest

    sveltest Member

    Good lord...the girls at this place.

    In an average class that i might have id say 80% are doable and 50% are downright gorgeous.

    So tired. And i still have another class at 6:30-9:00...bloody hell.

    Killed it in the gym today...back to a 405 DL which will go up fast if i can eat enough.

    Up since 3. Ima try to slip in a nap before class.
     
  11. sveltest

    sveltest Member

    Day 10.

    Debating if i should work out or if my soreness would make it counterproductive.
     
  12. sveltest

    sveltest Member

    Ill rest tomorrow.

    Tried to deload but that didnt work...

    Nap then cal 3. I gotta say tho school is harder than ever now. Its all on computers i dont have the course material...ive missed half my classes. So just keeping my head above water here.

    Surrounded by 9/10s in that class so its ok
     
  13. sveltest

    sveltest Member

    Long arms. Short legs. Long torso.

    No wonder my bench sucks compared to my DL.

    No lift psyches you out like the deadlift.

    In rehab 225 x9 bench 200 hanging clean and press.

    435 best ever DL. So weak...even tho im only 170. Time to pack some real muscle on my frame.

    If i can walk in and pick up 405 after 2 days im going up fast. Going to 550 in 6 weeks boys.

    My hands need to prepare the angus. No straps no belt.
     
  14. sveltest

    sveltest Member

    Day 11

    Feel like shit.
     
  15. sveltest

    sveltest Member

    Day 12

    No training or school yesterday (or today though i should probably crack open my cal 3 book at some point).

    Slept a lot and i suppose i really needed it. Almost no soreness at all but im gonna wait till sunday to hit the gym again.

    No really bad symptoms except i usually feel like crap when i wake up. This goes away quickly tho as i go through my morning routine.
     
    Last edited: Jan 27, 2019
  16. sveltest

    sveltest Member

    Day 13

    Lots of sleeping. Some very bad dreams. Craving speed/coke always having dreams about it. Soreness is gone back to the gym and school tomorrow.
     
  17. sveltest

    sveltest Member

    Day 14

    Drank a lot and did some drugs last night with money i made stacking wood. Proud of the work i did. Not proud of what i did with the money

    Morning wood seems to have deserted me. Flatline for sure.

    Gotta finish that job today. Try to be smarter with my money. Its needed for other things.
     
  18. sveltest

    sveltest Member

    The more i drink the more i hate.

    Stupidity. Moral weakness. My fellow "man". I see such weakness around me i want to pull out a fucking RPG and watch a niggas head explode.

    I am a large and powerful man but i have so little EXp talking to girls...

    Fu k it.
     
  19. Caoimhín

    Caoimhín Winter's coming...

    @sveltest What do you think is the bigger problem for you: PMO or alcohol?

    Since I have the same two problems, I have thought about this. I've actually made better progress beating PMO than booze but arguably, in terms of health and longevity, alcohol is much worse for your body. Fighting a war of two fronts is never easy but it seems this is your battle.

    Keep up the courage!
     
  20. sveltest

    sveltest Member

    Day 15

    Hi Caoimhin

    PMO by far is worse for my health. My mental health anyway. These sessions i used to have are no joke. 24 fapping, edging...you feel so gross after. Dehydrated...your vision is blurry from focusing on a tiny screen. Often times certain parts of my body will be numb.

    No my friend...ive been an alcoholic for 3 or 4 years. Never get hung over. Doesnt seem to interfere with my performance in the gym or bedroom. The problem i find is what you do when you are drunk or buzzed. These actions can have nasty consequences. Often drinking leads to hard drugs and that leads to fapping etc etc. Or youll act a fool...alienation...im sure you know.

    Its a fight for sure but PMO is faaaaaaaAaar more destructive to your mind and soul.
     

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