24yo, tracking my attempt to drop porn and masturbation

Discussion in 'Ages 20-24' started by Ícaro, Jan 2, 2023.

  1. Ícaro

    Ícaro New Member

    Hi, I'm Ícaro(pronounce is like Ekaro), 24 yo, will turn 25 in 2023, from Brazil.
    I want to quit watching porn and masturbating. I thik I'm well aware of the damage it causes in my life, especially how it messes with my neurochemistry and reward system. I've been trying to quit for a couple years now, had some good streaks, but always became complacent and returned to my bad habit of pmoing. I'd love to drop it cold turkey and never do it again, but I failed many times in the past, so my approach now is trying to do it as least as I can and hopefully come to a point where I just don't do it anymore. I'm also aware porn is the sympton, not the problem, and to truly recover instead of just abstaining I'll need to fix other areas of my life.
    This year, in order to not become complacent, I'll try to journal and update here about my experience every week, even when I feel no urges and it feels like I have it under control, that's when I'm most likely to relapse.

    PORNFREE
    Jan/23
    Feb/23
    Mar/23
    Apr/23
    May/23
    Jun/23
    Jul/23
    Aug/23
    Sep/23
    Oct/23
    Nov/23
    Dec/23


    NOFAP
    Jan/23
    Feb/23
    Mar/23
    Apr/23
    May/23
    Jun/23
    Jul/23
    Aug/23
    Sep/23
    Oct/23
    Nov/23
    Dec/23
     
    Rudolf Geyse likes this.
  2. Rudolf Geyse

    Rudolf Geyse Well-Known Member

    Go for it @Ícaro . Signing up and journalling is a good move. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain. PMO does nothing good for us. You can be excited about leaving behind a pattern of PMO and putting your life and energy into more worthwhile pursuits.
     
    Ícaro likes this.
  3. Ícaro

    Ícaro New Member

    PORNFREE (Relapses)
    Jan/23 - 04, 06, 07

    NOFAP (Relapses)
    Jan/23 - 04, 05, 06, 07, 09

    09/01/2023 - First week of the year was tough. Dealing with unemployment right now, so much uncertainty, feelings of unworthyness, ended up relapsing after a tough day when I was feeling very hopeless. I struggle very much after a relapse, those days after are very tough and a lot of times I end up relapsing again the following days. It's humbling to think that I've had 100+ days streaks last year and now I'm struggling to go 5 days without pmo. Trying to learn from it.
     
    Rudolf Geyse likes this.
  4. KarToN

    KarToN New Member

    Hi. Im 24yo as well and as you have the same problem ( 2years fighting addiction but failing). I hope you get over this and God bless you.
     
    Ícaro likes this.
  5. Ícaro

    Ícaro New Member

    PORNFREE (Relapses)
    Jan/23 - 04, 06, 07, 09, 11, 12, 13

    NOFAP (Relapses)
    Jan/23 - 04, 05, 06, 07, 09, 10, 11, 13

    15/01/2023 - Second week of the year was also tough, too many relapses, but I'm actually feeling very encouraged. Don't know if anyone else feels this, but it's like a confidence that it's the beggining of a good streak. I was struggling to go even a day without doing it, now I'm almost three days clean of orgasming without much trouble. I'm one of those that pmo edging for a long time opening multiple tabs, luckly I never escalated, just amateur stuff, it's bad but it could be even worse I guess. And this week it was happening day after day to the point my dick was sore and at some point I wasn't getting erections even with porn. Then something clicked in my mind, I focused just on not fapping, and it worked. I allowed myself to watch porn and interestingly enough it lost the appeal, I felt like, whats the point if i'm not going to orgasm? Now, I want to clear that I know it ain't acceptable to watch porn and I'll try my very best to never watch it again. So we will see if I'll be able to go on a long streak now or if it was just because my dick was sore and I'll keep relapsing.
    This week I also was reading again on this forum the thread from @bigbookofpenis on NoArousal method, it makes so much sense to me, that's exactly what I need. My brain is very damaged from 11 years of pmo. I lack the motivation to work and studying and feel unconfortable socialising. But binging on porn excites me. So I very much need a dopamine detox as well. I'll try my best to put this method in practice, I believe in it, and will update here.
     
    Rudolf Geyse likes this.
  6. KarToN

    KarToN New Member

    In my case I see that edging is making worse bc even if I dont O, next day I will have 2/3x more desire to PMO.
     
  7. Ícaro

    Ícaro New Member

    Last week I did not masturbated, it's been 10 days now, been many months since I stayed off of it for 10 days. Unfortunately I watched porn, but again, came to a point something clicked in my mind, I was watching it for like an hour, until I couldn't spike dopamine more without fapping, I actually came close, but something clicked and I was like, what's the point of doing this if I'm not going to orgasm? And real sex probably won't ever pleasure me this much for so long, this is so unreal and dumb. Then I stopped it and It's been almost 3 days and I haven't felt like watching it again. Let's see what happens next when frustration and loneliness hits hard.

    PORNFREE (Relapses)
    Jan/23 - 04, 06, 07, 09, 11, 12, 13, 14, 17, 20, 21

    NOFAP (Relapses)
    Jan/23 - 04, 05, 06, 07, 09, 10, 11, 13
     
  8. Ícaro

    Ícaro New Member

    In my experience it's only hard the first 4 to 5 days. After that there's urges only ocasionally between days 5 to 10, and after that most days I feel no urges to fap. It just becomes very manageable. I struggle more with watching it. Doesn't matter how many days it's been, if I'm on a bad day and I see some attractive woman on social media I tend to keep looking, then start remenbering onlyfans models and their new content, then it scalates and it's harder to stop. Being pornfree is way more tricky than nofap for me.
     
  9. Dr. Jekyll

    Dr. Jekyll Member

    I guess social media are you trigger so stop using them or drastically limit the usage.
     

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