19 years old Getting into the sexual marketplace but having some problems

Discussion in 'Ages -19' started by BedroomLeveling, Dec 22, 2022.

  1. BedroomLeveling

    BedroomLeveling New Member

    I been masturbating to porn since around the age of 11 years old so about 8 years now. I'm pretty sure my technique is pretty unorthodox because It seems similar to the description of deathgrip. I rub the head with one hand and hold the shaft still with the other (fairly tightly). Every time it's been with porn and only that technique. Usually everyday (I've taken a break for about a week).

    I've seen the consequences of my technique and porn consumption over the years coalesce into the majority of sexual encounters that I've had. Every encounter has been raw and I am unable to feel a sensation with vaginal penetration only with oral sex. It has also been difficult to get and maintain an erection during ever encounter as well. Usually I have to be given oral from pretty much complete flaccidity to get an erection, when it's time to penetrate I either lose the erection or lose it after a few strokes.

    I've had sex with 3 women so far and each one has been slightly different. The first (my virginity taker) was in my car and I never finished
    (I probably could have through oral but she hated the taste of precum). The second was in her bedroom, I felt vaginal penetration slightly, I stroked a few times while on top but when I felt myself losing my erection I had her get on top. I'm pretty sure once I was pretty much flaccid, she got off and gave oral to completion. The third was the most unfortunate because she's just super awesome and if I didn't have these issues, it'd be fucking perfect. It was on my bed and she sucked me to erection, I got a few strokes in but got flaccid. We're making out through this entire experience which I feel like is pretty much the one thing that truly turned me on. She was begging me to get hard the entire time and when I did she would call me super hot and mentally, she did everything perfect to turn me on but physically I just wasn't. Sadly I never even finished that night.

    I pretty much just want to make this post to figure what I need to do to make it easier to get and keep erections, and also become more sensitive. I don't want to have to rely on pills, clearly my habits from my childhood have resulted in my problem so there has to be something I can do to undo it also. I have a therapist that I'm talking to about this shit and I've just recently gotten my testosterone checked at 5 pm and it came out as 349 Ng/dl (not sure about free test) which is on the low end of normal and I should be getting it checked again next month. I've also recently joined the gym and plan to start eating better to hopefully increase test if that has to do with the problem. I really want culpability and want to check in around every week to give progress on how I'm doing and I plan on continuing no PMO for a month at least. Not sure how it will help with sensitivity but pretty sure it helps with the erection problem.
    Last edited: Dec 22, 2022
  2. Dr. Jekyll

    Dr. Jekyll Member

    You already know the answer: stop masturbating and watching porn. It won't be easy at first but it will be definitely worth it. Your life will definitely improve (not only in the sexual area) but you must be willing to put the effort.
    Find ways to employ your unused sexual energy to improve yourself and accomplish your life goals. If you stick to the plan, sex will come and it will be great.
  3. BedroomLeveling

    BedroomLeveling New Member

    I feel like that might help with erection problems but not sure if I see how that increases sensitivity tho (I could be wrong)
  4. Dr. Jekyll

    Dr. Jekyll Member

    It is not "might". It WILL DEFINITELY help you with both sensitivity and ED. You will improve in both areas. It might take you few weeks or few months, but your sexual life will much improve.

    This forum is full of success stories: whoever said goodbye for real to porn and masturbation had huge improvements with their mojo.

    You won't lose anything if you don't masturbate for few months. Give it a try and see how it goes. Based on my experience, you won't regret it.
  5. BedroomLeveling

    BedroomLeveling New Member

    I relapsed today but I believe I noticed an increase in sensitivity because what I did definitely differed from how I normally masturbate

    1. I stood up, I always sit or lie down

    2. I used a less aggressive technique.
    • Old technique - I grab my dick tightly with one hand and rub the front up and down fast and hard at a speed impossible to replicate during sex
    • New technique - I rub the sides at the shaft up and down at a slower speed than before although the rub distance is a bit shorter (not sure if good or bad for replicating the feel of sex)

    3. No lubricant, completely dry (not sure if this is good or bad since vaginas are actually naturally lubricated). Before I would always use spit

    4. Looked at nothing. Only used memories of sex in the past as fuel. Last time I masturbated without porn, I was probably 13 because porn was temporarily not available.

    Another reason I believe I've noticed an increase in sensitivity is because I've been having more accidental friction boners than usual.

    The plan from now is to not masturbate for at least 2 weeks and when I do again compare the sensitivity from now to then and experiment with the technique to make it as similar to the feeling of a vagina as I can (no Fleshlight, I hear they're too tight compared to real pussy). And if I think I'm less sensitive at that date, I guess I'll just take another break for around three weeks and see where to go from there (both possibilities also depend on if I can get pussy before the date ends tho cause if I can that changes some things).

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